This Can Only End in Success

Karos beat his previous record for greatest number of crazy ideas, and also tangled up the whole house in the rope tied to his waist (which somehow was much longer than it should have been).

Velak managed to get the door systems up and running, although being spiteful bastards they didn’t bother talking to you until later. His fiddling also made the doors lead randomly to the windows too, which enabled you to get into the library easily.

You found a hidden door which led to a magical vault guarded by an intelligent Cerberus. He didn’t want to let you by, but after you helped him get out of his contract he gave you the one treasure he could still access and told you the doors could talk.

Velak proceeded to try to get information out of them, but before he got very far Karos decided to add additional motivation to them by fiddling with their controls… and accidentally shutting them off, stranding himself in the control room and everyone else in the library. Before he managed to set things right the rest of you found that the windows led out into the air above the city, and got the imps to start making a bridge of books to the nearest platform. Unfortunately this attracted the attention of a red skinned griffonrider.

Once the doors were working again, you managed to convince the main one to let you upstairs. There you found the entire house had fragmented into platforms floating above the city. Before you got much farther you attracted the attention of more griffonriders.

Like I said in the email, you can all level up now.

Two Missions United as One Against a Common Foe

A month later you received two new missions. One was to halt the explosion of a house (already in progress), the other was to break into another house and stop a ritual as test of security. Instead of choosing you decided to combine the two by moving the explosion from one house to the other, proving once again that you have a +3 to collateral damage.

When you got to the exploding house you found that it appeared quite intact despite a number of wizards scurrying about out front. They didn’t seem to be able to help although you did find out that the explosion, if you can call it that, is somehow related to the spells that control the house’s interior dimensions. Unfortunately the owner, Lord Quincy Bunnthug, couldn’t give you more information because his butler usually handled that kind of thing. You also were warned that the doors were finicky and didn’t like leading where they should.

Undaunted you charged in, although Karos took the precaution of tying a rope to his waist and Velak blew the front door off its hinges (much to the owner’s dismay). You soon found out that indeed the doors did lead to random places and you were all split apart when the doors started closing again. Rambler, Velak, and Karos managed to independently make their way to the kitchen in search of the controls. There they ran afoul of the cleaning sprites and a battle ensued.

Xandor and Colbey, meanwhile, found a hole in the ceiling. At Xandor’s urging Colbey used a grappling hook to get up there and found himself looking through a hole in a small piece of flooring 50 feet above ground. His climbing set the small platform spinning, though, and he was forced to climb down or fall.

The Cave of Regretful Lightning

After some convincing and the slaying of numerous minions (Velak used a poison cloud to kill at least ten of them in one round, and should be thankful the Geneva Convention doesn’t exist in Telluran) you managed to get Gurfurlur to leave you alone and he left to rally his forces. You escaped into the cave just before the Kobolds brought the walls down. There you confronted one of the Kobold leaders only to find that they had undermined the floor which they collapsed under you and the newly arrived Gurfurlur (now aware of your real identities).

The final confrontation saw you fighting both orcs and kobolds in an ever expanding room of bolt stone. The battle was fierce but you eventually took down Gurfurlur. Karos managed to use his Ring of Orc summoning to bring in reinforcements and forced the kobolds into retreat. They didn’t get far before you killed them too.

With the battle finally over you set about sealing the spring so that no one could have access to the waters. The orcs are in disarray so leaving the fort was no big challenge, but you are still in the gobbles at present. We’ll wrap up this mission at the beginning of the next session.

XP reward is 2705

The Food Fight to End All Food Fights

The spring was in a cave surrounded by heavy orcish fortifications.

In one of the strangest plans I’ve seen you do so far, you made your way to the spring and gained access to the area by challenging the local orc chef to a cook-off, which you managed to win. During this contest, Rambler snuck back into the rest of the area and mapped it out.

Before you could do anything more, though, the Kobolds attacked. What followed was an epic battle, with Kobolds rising from everywhere and unleashing brutal traps, and the Orcs responding with wave after wave of catapult fodder (sometimes literally) and siege weaponry. Through this all you managed to keep up the pretense of being orcs or orcish ingredients.

The orcish catapults proved particularly problematic; as stones randomly landed throughout the camp they smashed the walkway to the cave and later the orcish barracks. This woke Gurfurlur, who unaware of the cookoff ordered his followers to attack you. This left everyone but Karos (who had already made his way back to the cave) to face both the Kobolds and the Orcs that were still in the way.

Two Faced

The battle finished relatively quickly although one of the orcs did almost throw Karos off the bridge. With the immediate incursion halted for the time being you managed to slip into orc territory. The security inside was lax, possibly because no one expected enemies to be in so far, but more likely because orcs are lazy.

The orcish mess tent is a focal point of their lives. When you started knocking it down they reacted badly, charging out into the street while shouting “Protect the Dinner! Protect the Dinner!” Alas it did them no good as you quickly dispatched them. Then, using a combination of disguise kits, magic items, and the skinned face of the head chef, Xandor and Karos disguised themselves as orcs to avoid further trouble.

This disguise got you across the bridges to the other major landmass with no confrontations. Unfortunately the particular bridges you took led straight to a broken sewer outflow tunnel. There you encountered a strange dark skinned elf who bolted when you noticed him. He managed to get away by phasing through a wall, but not before Alistair took off one of his ears.

On the way out you encountered the young sphinx again, but Rambler had a riddle ready for him and he went away without complaints.

The Longjohns of Destiny

The dragon appeared to be speaking to someone other than you as he didn’t immediately notice any of you. Eventually he did track each of you down and smell you, but even then he seemed to be savoring your aroma more than looking at you specifically. Only when he smelled Colbey did he seem to wake up. (I can post the exact words he said about each of you if you want).

He pondered what to do with you all for a bit, seeming unwilling to eat you (although he may have meant something else). Eventually he settled on sending you down to the undercity to find the descendents of his old minions. He wants you to find objects that have been in close proximity to the most powerful creatures down there; anything that would pick up their smell, the stronger the better.

You manage to make your way down to the Gobbles unharmed and made a beeline for the Hobgoblin HQ. Through some fast talking initiated, surprisingly enough, by Velak, you managed to get into the Hob’s good graces and even got the Hobgoblin leader to turn over a pair of his rancid long johns (which the dragon seemed to savor… ewww).

With the Hobs in the local area tolerating your presence you started the crossing into Orc territory, and thus began the battle on the bridge.

A Thief of Time

The fight was brutal. The thief kept throwing various defenses in your way whenever you got close to him. In addition to Bob and the discs he released a wraith, two rat hosts and a pair of gargoyle traps at you. In the end he tried to retreat, but through a few well timed lies you managed to convince him you had the teleport scroll he was looking for and he came back down to try and get it back.

With the head safely recovered you had a bargaining chip and managed to work a bigger payment out of the Adeptus. She agreed in return for escorting her scrying crystal to see whatever hidden area the statue pieces unlocked.

What you found there was an enormous, corpulent red dragon sleeping on a mound of treasure. Before you could retreat he opened one eye and said “It’s no use running, I already know you are there.”

I believe this was the point I said you could all level up. Well I was right. Between the fights, the puzzles, and the quest rewards you got 1910 XP. That should put you up at 13,465 total.

The Statue Got Me High

A large scale fight with crumbling golems ensues and you managed to break enough of them to create a lull in the fighting and escaped while the golems tried to pull themselves together. You don’t know when they stopped chasing you since you never looked back.

With the arm recovered you set about trying to find the head. By calling in favors and nearly getting into a magic match with a powerful warlock you eventually tracked the thief back to a slightly collapsed chapel or museum. Karos tried another of his infamous disguise tactics but the thief was so paranoid he retreated further into the building without even seeing who was knocking.

Thus you ended up in the entrance of a the building with a warforged swordmage and two serrated discs discs.

Tipping the Balance

The gardens of the temple, though overgrown or perhaps because of it, were not happy with your presence and a short battle with the local flora ensued. The fey trees put up a struggle, but in the end they were chopped down like so much firewood.

In the basement of the temple you found the trials of Meharma, a massive set of scales with a set of dynamic, shifting, musical weights. In the process of balancing the scales you tore off one arm, then the other so that you could force the arms level. This allowed you access to the treasure but also woke up its dismembered guardians.

The shattered golems are closing in on you now. They are in pieces but are slowly assembling themselves and getting stronger as they do.

A Roll of the Semi Solid Protoplasmic Dice

A new mission this time. Karos’ mentor asked you to do a favor and help out one of his contacts so that she could get him the items that she needed. He worried that her house arrest would keep her from being able to get him the items he paid her for. She maintains the matter is well in hand but she is willing to pay you for something else anyways. She needs you to track down two relics from the old days: A stone head she tried to steal from the Magistry’s HQ, and an arm from the ancient temple of Meharma.

You succeeded in figuring out which neighborhood the temple was in, but further investigation was interrupted by a pair of opportunistic gelatinous cubes which dropped down on you from above and tried to eat you. Being polyhedrons themselves they somehow had an uncanny effect on dice, making hitting them extremely hard.

You are now standing in an alleyway, worn out and covered in goo. (“Oh not again…”)

On the plus side, cubes don’t usually get a chance to grow that big in the city. You are probably close.


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